Amy Eden, an adult child of alcoholics and writer offers insight into navigating the waters of being in love with an “ACA.”
Have you heard the one about the confused man whose girlfriend of a year and a half suddenly got mad and left him? Just up and left. They’d never fought, not once. The relationship seemed perfectly fine. He’d introduced her to his friends and his whole family. They were engaged. They were going to get married. Then she split.
Haven’t heard that one? Well, I have. Time and again. Loving someone whose parents are alcoholics is challenging and often unpredictable territory.
How can anyone really know if their partner, potential husband or wife, came from an alcoholic household? It’s rarely clear. Sometimes it’s not known that someone’s parents are alcoholics — plenty of people have alcoholic parents without realizing it. Other times a person can have alcoholic parents and know it, but not understand the extent to which growing up in that environment affected them.
While the confused man stands shell shocked, we can examine his fiancee’s perspective. She met and fell for a wonderful man. He had his life together, treated her kindly, and wanted a future with her. It was love
Author: Imported Blogs
If you want to stop arguing all the time, avoid these mistakes
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It doesn’t seem that long ago when I wrote a slew of articles to support the many under chronically high levels of stress, worry and preoccupation during the pandemic. A common thread connecting my audience, clients and many people around me was uncertainty. No matter how people experienced it, the collective response involved some level of fear and loss of control. As humans can do, we sharpened our resilience and in many cases dug into what self-care during crisis looks like.
A recent Kaiser survey survey showed that 90% of the public believes there is a mental health crisis. Primary concerns are mental health issues with teens and children, and anxiety or depression in adults. One-third of U.S. adults said they have “always” or “often” felt anxious in the past year, and another third said they felt anxious “sometimes.” Sources of stress for adults in particular include finances as well as politics and current events.
In my therapy practice and personal life, I’ve seen concerns about the existential threats of extreme political divide, war, uptick in incidents involving hate and uncertainty about the direction of Covid. We barely have had enough time to apply the salve on our prior wounds before stress
Drs. John and Julie Gottman discuss their New York Times bestseller, The Love Prescription: Seven Days to More Intimacy, Connection, and Joy.
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Resilience is the ability to recover from adversity which can include illness, loss, financial instability, natural disasters and any other highly stressful events. With all we have been through globally in the last several years, it’s evident people have learned how to cope with a lot of challenges. Sadly, the undulating waves of collective stress, worry and grief continue, while bearing witness to an unprovoked war and unfolding human tragedy in Ukraine.
There is a palpable sense of feeling frayed again and time for a reminder about how to pool your inner resources to weather these storms. The book, Bouncing Back: Rewire Your Brain for Maximum Resilience and Well-Being, by Linda Graham, MFT, is an excellent resource to do just that. Here are some important nuggets you can practice now to help you move forward in the best way possible.
Resilience and the 6 C’s of Coping
1 – Calm
Learn to regulate your flight, fight, freeze response to experience inner peace vs numbness or collapse.
Try This: Hand on the Heart
Place your hand on your heart, close your eyes and breathe gently. Call to mind a moment with someone who loves you unconditionally. Feel the moment with them, notice their kind expression towards you.
Strengthen your bond during the transition to parenthood with our research-based relationship tips for new and expecting parents.
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We asked our followers to share some of the “small words, small gestures, and small acts” their partners do for them. Our hearts were so warmed by the responses, we’d love to share some of them with you.
The post Small Things Often: Ingredients for a Happy Relationship appeared first on The Gottman Institute.
Inclusivity in parenting workshops is essential for families to feel comfortable and see themselves represented. Read on to learn about our updated Bringing Baby Home programs.
The post Inclusivity in Parenting Workshops: Bringing Baby Home appeared first on The Gottman Institute.
We’ve all had an ex that we can’t get out of our minds. A harmful friendship we hold on to even though it exhausts us. Or even a family member who is toxic. Why can’t we learn how to let go of someone, even when we know they’re not good for us? Holding on is […]
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How to date the Gottman way
The post How Do Gottman Principles Apply to the Dating World? appeared first on The Gottman Institute.